A Rookie's Worst Nightmare: The Check Out Run
Every rookie has their day of destiny. Sometimes it doesn't go so well.
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Editor-in-Chief
- Jun 21, 2021
- 18 min
Daddy Issues
Our EIC has been fucking around, not writing, and causing all kinds of mayhem in his own life. Here's why.
367 views
Editor-in-Chief
- Apr 16, 2021
- 12 min
As My Father Fades
Our Editor-in-Chief is grappling with the inevitable loss of his father. He tries to sort through it with this piece.
553 views
Editor-in-Chief
- Apr 9, 2021
- 8 min
How the Mighty Have Bailed
Ever get ahead of yourself? Yeah, our Editor-in-Chief has too. This time, it happened during a climbing trip to Zion National Park.
1,681 views
Editor-in-Chief
- Apr 2, 2021
- 9 min
The Symphony of Morning Boat Loading
Dust, rubber and chaos. This is a sensory experience.
2,467 views
Editor-in-Chief
- Mar 24, 2021
- 10 min
The Vision Explained
The EIC lays it all out, explaining why TDL exists, and what our goals and aspirations are. If ambition bothers you, don't read.
280 views
Editor-in-Chief
- Mar 19, 2021
- 10 min
An Ode to the Best Dirtbag Dive Bar in the West
In any great river town, there is a dive bar the guides get to call their own. This is the story of the best there ever was.
1,788 views
Editor-in-Chief
- Mar 12, 2021
- 16 min
The Domestication of a Dirtbag
Read this to find out how a dirtbag set aside his player ways and fell for a civilian. Our Editor-in-Chief is lovesick, bro.
283 views
Editor-in-Chief
- Mar 1, 2021
- 8 min
I am Powerful. I am Inevitable. I am Pabst Blue Ribbon.
Our Editor-in-Chief plans to conquer the world. And he's gonna do it with a cold PBR in hand
265 views
Editor-in-Chief
- Feb 26, 2021
- 6 min
Tip Your Fucking Guide
Just do the right thing. Please. We're begging you.
769 views
Editor-in-Chief
- Feb 19, 2021
- 4 min
Raft Guides Review YOU
What if raft guides got to write reviews for their customers?
1,280 views
Editor-in-Chief
- Feb 12, 2021
- 7 min
Ski Town Landlords Are Lizard People
The government will deny this, but there's evil afoot in the mountains. And it's cold-blooded.
1,493 views
Editor-in-Chief
- Feb 4, 2021
- 14 min
Don't Sweat the Technique
In my early twenties, I was a self-obsessed loser whose primary concern was conning everyone into thinking I was doing well. A friend’s...
500 views
Editor-in-Chief
- Jan 25, 2021
- 10 min
I Shit My Pants on a Boat in Montana
I have been locked in a battle of wills with my gastrointestinal system for as long as I can remember. Usually, my bowels win. At 5 years...
493 views
Editor-in-Chief
- Jan 19, 2021
- 7 min
Red Eye Til' I Die
My extended family are bottom-of-the-barrel, counterfeit, cowardly, sacks of shit. I won’t name them. Despite their lack of spines, and...
255 views
Editor-in-Chief
- Jan 18, 2021
- 4 min
The Aliens Want You on Skis
A dear friend, known to his social media following as Homie Rafiki, recently called me from Montana. We caught up as traveling dirtbags...
191 views
Editor-in-Chief
- Jan 15, 2021
- 11 min
Heavy B and The Great Chicken Massacre of 2018
Most people will never admit to having ever felt anything other than love for their dog. For a time though, I despised mine. Heavy B is a...
180 views
Editor-in-Chief
- Jan 1, 2021
- 5 min
Bare Midriffs, Flannels and Football: A Post Covid-19 Dream
It’s half past noon on a Sunday in September.
You rise from a deep tequila-induced slumber, the stale taste of last night’s heaters...
264 views
Editor-in-Chief
- Jan 1, 2021
- 15 min
A Dance with Demons and Delusion
I’ll spare you the self-aggrandizing horseshit about “finding the strength to talk about this” or whatever. Instead, I’ll just come out...
484 views
Editor-in-Chief
- Jan 1, 2021
- 4 min
How to Handle Every Type of Dirtbag River Rat
Whitewater presents a laundry list of hazards and potentially life threatening scenarios. But if you’re planning on becoming a guide,...
584 views
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